When ilan turned 7 months, he stopped sleeping longer than 2-hour stretches at night. We endured thinking it was just a phase… but it’s been 19 months.

Throughout these months, we’ve had moments of coming down to our knees with exhaustion, and others of laughing our way through the pain. And, in between, learning how to manage my energy levels has unlocked a new way of life for me, in the midst of sleep deprivation.

I no longer prioritise getting to the bottom of my to-do list before considering to re-charge. I no longer wait until I feel like I deserve a pause before I allow myself some time and space to reset. Mainly, I changed my relationship with the way I manage my energy levels by prioritising daily habits that fill me back up.

I’m choosing to share these with you, in hope that you too might find a way of co-existing with this part of the reality of motherhood. Picking one action at a time, one that resonates with you, is the best way to start. We can slowly stack more actions to create a daily-ish routine that works for us. The most important take-away is that these habits allow us to feel and communicate with our bodies, so that we learn to listen to the whispers of exhaustion before it screams in our face. It’s a way of dropping the tension and stepping into a healthier relationship with the pain of interrupted sleep and the relentlessness of daily parenting.

Morning & Evening routine

Energy management begins with the way we start and end our day.

In the morning

1. Move your body - A 20 minute walk is all you need to revitalise the body, especially after a rough night. For most of us, the last thing we feel like doing with our exhausted bodies after a restless night is to use up the little energy we feel we have left. However, exercising in the morning will elevate your energy levels and mood, setting you up for your daily activities with more ease.

2. Practice Nidra, meditation, or breath awareness - This can be as short as taking three full conscious breaths to restore your nervous system and energy levels. Sometimes our sense of depletion comes from feeling like we’re constantly switched on, even throughout the night as we are conscious of our children in our sleep. Building up practices to soothe the nervous system will lower our levels of stress and anxiety, and allow us to feel more energised.

3. Receive fresh air & sunlight - Stepping outside to breathe in fresh air and receive sunlight into our eyes/eyelids can reset our circadian rhythms and shake off the cobwebs of sleep deprivation.

In the evening

1. Empty your thoughts - Journaling is a great way to quiet the racing mind. It can help us to unwind as we observe our thoughts and create some distance between ourselves and our emotions. This can improve the quality of our sleep, regardless of how much sleep we actually get. Another great way to clear and calm the mind is through EFT. Reading is also a nice way to transition away from the day and into a space of rest.

2. Release tension in the body - Stretching or following rhythmic movements can support our bodies to rest deeper at night. Another great way to nourish our bodies for a good night sleep is to raise our legs up the wall, or on top of a chair, while lying flat on our backs. Lying on a Shakti Mat can also be a powerful way to release tension and prepare the body for rest.

food

Managing our energy levels through nutrition is key.

1. Never skip breakfast - Managing our sugar levels starts with breakfast. This will affect our hormones, our mood and our digestion, which will impact our energy throughout the day as well as the quality of our sleep at night.

2. Notice what and when to eat in the evening - Our evening meal should essentially carry us throughout the night to allow the body to restore fully and deeply. Leaving at least two hours between dinner and bedtime, and including lentils, dark leafy greens and good quality fats can set us up for better sleep. Reishi mushrooms and concentrated cherry juice can also increase the quality of our sleep significantly.

earthing

Being in direct contact with the ground stabilises our physiology.

Grounding to humans is like plugging your phone to charge. It has the same effect in that it resets our bodily functions, lowers inflammation and re-energises us at the deepest level.

There are different ways to practice grounding. You can allow your feet to touch the ground for 10 mins, perhaps in the morning while you’re soaking in the mornings’ sunlight. Or, you can choose to touch and be with nature, for example a tree or a plant. There are also bed sheets you can buy that allow your body to rest grounded throughout the night.

the reality of living with sleep deprivation

While I implement all of the above on a daily-ish basis, I cannot ignore the fact that there are many days where the exhaustion keeps me from being the mother I want to be, and the business owner I aspire to become. There are many times in the month where I simply need to slow it right down and go back to basics - and that’s okay. I accept that as long as I continue to co-sleep with my toddler, I will not get the deep rest I need. I’m very much always reflecting on ways to manage my energy levels in a way that feels sustainable. My focus is always in the long-term, ensuring I’m planting the seeds that will allow me to continue to raise my family rooted in my values, prioritising our health and well being. If this sounds like you, then check my 1:1 health coaching options that can support you with just that!

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